My day was not great.

I have a headache. I have a stomache-ache. Im hot. Im a little angry. Im lonely. I feel pathetic. I feel overlooked. I feel invisible. And i swear, some days id just really like to fit in somewhere. ANYWHERE. Im sick of being the black sheep, the flamingo amoungst pigeons, the one and only person who doesnt fit in ANYWHERE. Not at school. Not at church. Not at home. Im tired of there always being a problem with something. Im tired of nothing to do. Im tired of spending day after day after day doing the same thing at the same place. I want a life. I want a group of people who i fit in with. I want a culture to be part of. I dont care if its tea-drinkers that spend days taking photos or city people who spend days at the mall hanging out. I just want PEOPLE and i want to belong. Because the whole apathetic no social life scene is not working for me. I hate how i live in a tiny town with nothing to do and nowhere to go. I want a city. I want lights and stores and events. I want to be constantly around people. I want job opportunitys as opposed to my options being, um, lets see. That would be walmart or mcdonalds. I want numerous swimming pools to choose from. And rivers to go too and people to do things with. Because here its like im trapped. And i hate feeling discontent but its what im feeling right now and im tired of hiding it. And im tired of being stuck inside my four walls inside this tiny town, and watching everybody leave. And wondering, whens my turn? When do I get to unlock the cage and fly away? How come so many people walk in and out of my life all the time, and im helpless to do anything but sit here and watch them leave? Im just tired of living a disfunctional life and having to act like its ok all the time when its not. Its not ok.